As a family we find ourselves constantly drifting and resetting, drifting and resetting. For example, as parents we do really well and then we get lax on certain family principles or rules because the kids are doing well. Eventually, however, we find that our “laxness” is taken advantage of and things start getting out of control. But it happens gradually and we don’t notice it.
Until one defining day. That day slaps us in the face and says, “Wake up, parent person!” It is at this point we finally realize how far off the path we have strayed. Then, we have to do a reset with our kids. We have to pull out the “I’m the parent” speech and lay the law down again.
Honestly, I am not sure if we are yanking our kids around like a yo-yo or this is just part of learning for them (and for us as parents). It seems like we could be a bit more stable, but with teenagers, is anything stable? ;-)
So every now and then we have to do a reset. We don’t give out as many benefits of a doubt. No slack is given. They have to earn it back. It may seem harsh, but it is all done in love. We need to reset our expectations and remember why we are a family. This is a “get back to basics” session – we all need to be reminded from time to time.
But as parents the eventual chaos can see overwhelming until we realize that reset time has come. Then after we do this, our whole family can breath a bit better. The pressure that has been building up is deflated and we can start over again. The volume in our home goes down, as does the stress. The world seems right again.
Now, we just have to figure out a way to recognize this condition a bit more quickly and maybe we can stabilize a bit. We are still working on that.
Nancy F., Amarillo, TX
